Not in Brooklyn

When I travel, there’s always the urge to record images of things unknown to the County of Kings: witness Lays Biscuits & Gravy potato chips. The idea makes me shudder. Are they whitish with small brown chunks on top?

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Terrible looking watermelons

You mean, because they’re jackfruits? It’s not the first time I’ve had trouble identifying these things. Their ginormousness threw me off. Get one today to feed your village.

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Makin’ Stuffin’

Looks like a loaf of white bread in a special plastic bag. You’d think that cooks who start from scratch might use fancier bread. But I’m not the one to ask, because I always thought stuffing came in a bag with the words Pepperidge Farm on it.

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View from the ice cream store

The kid’s putting on his shirt in front of the ice cream store. It’s the beach, so I don’t think “no shirt, no shoes, no service” applies. He could be aiming for one out of two, though.

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Pickles ‘n cole slaw

Here’s your appetizer. To get one for yourself at the New Floridian, go to Kings Plaza, then drive down Flatbush until you see a restaurant that doesn’t look like a diner, thanks to its modernized facade. Park the car (only a lunatic would take public transportation this far out); you have arrived! Enjoy.

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Aisle 15: Olive oil & pickles

This is one of those huge grocery stores; Brooklyn has a few of them. What’s important in this picture are the pickles. This weekend is Memorial Day, so there’s going to be a mad rush on picnic supplies starting very soon. You’ve been warned.

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Nathan’s is on the boardwalk

Nathan’s normal spot, on Surf Avenue by the subway station, is still being reno’ed after the hurricane damage, so this is the Coney Island location for hot dogs and assorted fried food you might be craving. Everyone goes here. This is the first fur-trimmed wrap I’ve seen on the boardwalk, though that is only because there’s no Mermaid event in cold weather.

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This is where the camera bugged out

Or maybe something happened during the upload? All of the elements take on extra significance in this arty accident: the woman who is probably heading to a wedding, the crooked police and fire call box, the call-a-car, and even the color red.

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Hey, tough guy

Get off the F train at York Street, the last stop in Brooklyn, and walk downhill toward the water, and you’ll pass this Mexican restaurant. I think it’s the only one in Dumbo, which would make it both the best and the worst. But if you’d asked my opinion after I’d just eaten there, I would have said, Not the best, not the worst. To avoid this confusion, just eat somewhere else.

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Come on in the cake shop!

This is a mistake… The door to the cake shop is wide open and no one is around… Maybe I should go in and have a better look?

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